Eka's Portal Writing Group - Oct 2009 - All Submissions In!

[KavenBach]

Will becoming the pred's poop provide the one and only fertilizer that will save the all-important Tree of Life?

OMFG I laughed out loud so hard I gave myself a headache.

Just as long as you didn't wake your wife this time.

And while I don't enjoy Scat as a rule, I try to keep an open mind.

[Kruft]

Oh, hang on. I may have to edit my story slightly then if there's no underage sexuality. Ah well, can't be too hard, thanks to the power of the MONTAGE

[Mirukani]

*dredges up writing skills* I suppose I'll give this one a go. Heck, one of the stories I'm working on even fits with the challenge theme, so I just have to actually, y'know, finish it. If Bannor decides to submit something, at least he won't be the only M/M writer on here this month.

[4ofSwords]

I just posted a story to my gallery (link) that I was thinking about posting for this month. I really want to get some feedback on it because I think it needs a lot of improvement, but even though it ends in what is more or less unbirthing, I don't even thing the mighty Jacq Blacq would like it. It's not the pretty kind of succubus story, and the sex is... I don't know if graphic is the right word, but that's what I'm calling it.

What do you think? Should I post the next chapter of Samish instead? The one that explains? That's what was originally on my schedule.

[4ofSwords]

I'm too impatient. Here's the next chapter of Samish, in which I have some 'splainin' to do! I'll save the other story for the Halloween special.

ABOUT YOU:
Your name: Swords, 4 of Swords.
Your writing library URL(s): http://4ofSwords.com
Have you read the rules and guidelines, and do you agree to them? I have read them, indeedy!
In particular, have you read the part about providing meaty comments (at least two or three good paragraphs, and try to answer the author's questions, if any) on the three stories you're assigned, and do you agree? What is this? A new question? Well, I answer yes to this one, too.
Have you proofread your own story? I have proofread it and also beaten it with a stick.

YOUR POST:
Title/Summary: The Many Deaths of Samish, Chapter 4. For those of you getting tired of a repetitive storyline, Sam is half-way intelligent in this one and asks questions and even gets answers! Hooray! If you haven't ready any of chapters 1-3, check out the spoiler section below.
Word Count: 5224. 2500 words is ... roughly halfway. If you want to drop it after 2500 words, I suck, and deserve to know just how much.
Rating and Classification: There is nudity without genitalia - what is that worth? PG13, or NC17 for disturbingness? F/m Soul Vore. If you don't want to be assigned soul vore, make sure you speak up in your preferences!
Type of Critique Preferred: I like honest critique. If you don't like it, I want to know why. If you do, I still want to know why. Point out typos, point out brainos, point out where nothing makes sense. If you haven't read any of the previous 3 chapters, that's liable to be quite a bit.
Questions for the Readers: This chapter is full of dialog and peculiar, strangely described scenery. Did it work? Did it seem strange, but still hold your interest? Did it seem contrived and silly?

YOUR READING LIST:
Rating and Classification Preferred: I read what needs to be read and will read anything that follows the submission guidelines.
Critiquing Style: I'm generally verbose and detailed and sometimes harsh, but I'll try to follow the type of critique requested by the author.
Don't forget to attach your writing! Consider it attached.

Spoiler: show

• Chapter 1: Sam, a 20-something newlywed with a goldfish memory, is given the chore of cleaning out the basement by his equally 20-something wife, Lara. He gets early relief from his chore by a sweet-talking plant monster who know more about Sam than he does himself, including how wonderfully delicious he is. Sam is eaten.
• Chapter 2: Sam, a 20-something stay-at-home husband, is taken on a hike-and-hump by his 30-something wife, Lara. Lara sends him to the river to fill the canteens, where he meets a charming water goddess/naga who likes to nibble with her envenomed fangs. Sam is eaten.
• Chapter 3: Sam, a 20-something sugarbaby, is left behind by his 40-something wife, Lara, as she leaves on a business trip. Rather than leave Sam to his loneliness, Lara matches him up with an RP buddy on everyone's favorite vore site. Sam's new friend, an insatiable alligatoress online, shows up at his house to reveal herself as an insatiable alligatoress in person. Sam is eaten.

[Mirukani]

ABOUT YOU:
Your name: Mirukani
Your writing library URL(s): http://aryion.com/g3/showgallery.php?id=163537
Have you read the rules and guidelines, and do you agree to them? Yep
In particular, have you read the part about providing meaty comments (at least two or three good paragraphs, and try to answer the author's questions, if any) on the three stories you're assigned, and do you agree? Yup!
Have you proofread your own story? Er... yeah. Typos bother me while I'm still writing, so I usually go back and fix them right away. @_@

YOUR POST:
Title/Summary: Poetic Justice - Seishak is tired of being sexually harassed by one of his superiors, and finds a unique way to get some peace and quiet while still giving his harasser what he wants... sort of.
Word Count: 1057
Rating and Classification: Er, soft vore. M/M, unwilling, implied fatal digestion. PG? PG-13, tops.
Type of Critique Preferred: I'd actually like a focus on the voice of the character. Right now, character voice is something that I'm having difficulty with, especially in first person, so any thoughts on improvements I could make in that area would be helpful. Other than that, I'm happy with just a general critiquing.
Questions for the Readers: Should I include more description? Make it longer? I have such a hard time telling D:

YOUR READING LIST:
Rating and Classification Preferred: I don't like scat or watersports. Beyond that, I'm willing to read just about anything, although I'm a sucker for M/M where both pred and prey are human or humanoid.
Critiquing Style: Uhhh... not used to critiquing. Generalized, I suppose? I'm a spelling freak, though. If you want me to bold/underline/whatever to all your spelling mistakes, it's doable for me. @_@ I've found typos in published books and they drove me nuts

Don't forget to attach your writing!

[4ofSwords]

Title/Summary: Poetic Justice

Excellent! Welcome to the group, Mirukani!

[Jacquelope]

ABOUT YOU:
Your name: Le Jacquelope, aka Le Jacque Attacque
Your writing library URL(s): http://aryion.com/g3/showgallery.php?id=155866
Have you read the rules and guidelines, and do you agree to them? Yes
Have you proofread your own story? Yes, this is actually another major revision.

YOUR POST:
Title/Summary: The Many Journeys of Ian Scranton, Chapter 3: Captive Audience
Ian boldly goes where no man has gone before - or, at least, come back from.
This is a major experiment in "fan service".

Word Count: 9412
At 2000 words? C'mon, really. This story hits the ground running. At 2000 words the fan service is still in progress.

Rating and Classification: Fairy extra soft vore and some FFM sex.

Type of Critique Preferred: Sock it to me! No, not the left eye, thank you very much!

Questions for the Readers: What do you think of the way this story is unfolding? Does it flow? Is there too much dialog? Was the "fan service" part well done? How's the pacing?

YOUR READING LIST:
Rating and Classification Preferred: I prefer human/elf/fairy female preds but will tolerate furries. I absolutely avoid stories with underaged participants. I prefer to avoid scat and yaoi but if I'd rather read that than any underaged stuff. I'm a father of three, ya know!

Critiquing Style: I'm a big picture guy. I tend not to bother with spelling errors unless they're way too numerous or really distracting. Except for my stories - if you see them then please tell me!

This story can be found at: http://www.aryion.com/g3/showitem.php?id=174613

[4ofSwords]

Hiya, all!

There's still a little more than a week left for October submissions, but don't let that lull you into complacency; those seven days sneak up quickly!

[Kruft]

ABOUT YOU:
Your name: Kruft
Your writing library URL(s): robvonkruft.deviantart.com
Have you read the rules and guidelines, and do you agree to them?: Well, yeah.
In particular, have you read the part about providing meaty comments (at least two or three good paragraphs, and try to answer the author's questions, if any) on the three stories you're assigned, and do you agree?: It may prove difficult but I'll give it mah best.
Have you proofread your own story?: Well, yeah.

YOUR POST:
Title/Summary: The Tale of Miss Foxfire
Non-sexual story I wrote for a friend of mine Murrie. Vixen who punishes naughty children by eating them. There was a major Roald Dahl influence on this one.

Word Count: Around 1000. *facepalm* I just couldn't write anymore. D:
Rating and Classification: Pretty much PG. Non-sexual furry F/M underage prey.
Type of Critique Preferred: I know this is my first story and it probably is terrible but please don't be harsh. Don't be really gentle either but...y'know. Take it easy.
Questions for the Readers: One really.
YOUR READING LIST:
Rating and Classification Preferred: I'll read pretty much anything non-CV, non-plant and non-weird orifice vore (nose, tail, eyes, etc).
Critiquing Style: I'm a very nice person so I hope that'll be reflected. I try to find something I like in all stories.

Don't forget to attach your writing!

[4ofSwords]

Your name: Kruft

Welcome, Kruft!

Two things: If you find yourself in need of help on critiquing, please drop me a PM before giving up. It's not as hard as some people build it up to be. Also, can you post your story as an attachment? Not everyone has a dA account set to view mature material.

[Black-Boo]

I'm hard at work on my latest story, "Goddess of the Desert"!

Not exactly sure how I can incorperate vore, but I'm sure I'll think of something...

[Kruft]

Okay, all attached. Enjoy!

[4ofSwords]

Okay, all attached. Enjoy!

Splendid!

[KavenBach]

Hmm. I'm in the middle of a creative slump right now... nothing seems to want to come out of my head, even when I force myself to sit down and draw/write.

I could just toss up Chapter 2 of Ambassadors of the Flesh... it's a "First Contact" tale, after all, if not a "First Timer." But, so far I'm seeing the offerings this month and, considering how hard it was to find the energy to review the tales last month, I hesitate. M/M, Furry, underage-isms... not sure how well a cannibal/dolcett-themed tale would go over either. Although admittedly, the cooking stuff is barely a few paragraphs at the end... the rest is sex, sex, more sex, and frogman/woman semi-willing soft vore.

What's the verdict?

[Jacquelope]

Hmm. I'm in the middle of a creative slump right now... nothing seems to want to come out of my head, even when I force myself to sit down and draw/write.

Agh. It's a disease. Get away from me. Er, oops, too late. Been in a slump myself for 2 weeks, darn it.

I could just toss up Chapter 2 of Ambassadors of the Flesh... it's a "First Contact" tale, after all, if not a "First Timer." But, so far I'm seeing the offerings this month and, considering how hard it was to find the energy to review the tales last month, I hesitate. M/M, Furry, underage-isms... not sure how well a cannibal/dolcett-themed tale would go over either. Although admittedly, the cooking stuff is barely a few paragraphs at the end... the rest is sex, sex, more sex, and frogman/woman semi-willing soft vore.

What's the verdict?

Rule #1 - finish what ya start. I for one am posting up all of Ian Scranton...

[4ofSwords]

What's the verdict?

Quite selfishly, I say post, post, post. I, for one, would like to see what happens next in AotF, but I'm finding it difficult to read anything not in the EPWG these days - I feel like I have so much other stuff backlogged that I'm "wasting time".

I hear ya on the slump, though.

[KavenBach]

Heh. Maybe the slump is seasonal then.

It's been up in my drawing gallery here for a while now... I'll re-upload the most recent version and link it here soon. Right now though I'm trying desperately to get my EPVT entry done despite el slumpe.

[KavenBach]

ABOUT YOU:
Your name: KavenBach or K-Bach.
Your writing library URL(s): Drawing and writing both: http://aryion.com/g3/showgallery.php?id=69962
Have you read the rules and guidelines, and do you agree to them? En effet.
Have you proofread your own story? Yes. Re-read it this morning with last-minute changes added. Mostly word changes to avoid repetitivenessivity.

YOUR POST:
Title/Summary: "Ambassadors of the Flesh Part Two: Meating the council." The ambassadors from Amazoria are led to the palace to meet the ruling grenoil council. Once there, clothing and restraint become superfluous due to the grenoil pheromones in the air. "First contact" between the two countries takes on a whole new meaning.
Word Count: Just shy of 10,000 words... 9,948 I believe, if ya wanna be that picky. If you read to the asterisks/page break it's a little over 6,000 words, and you get to avoid the limited cooking/carving scene at the end, but you miss the only detailed vore of the chapter as well.
Rating and Classification: Multiple references to Frogman/human woman vore. Multiple refeences to pheromone-enduced lust. Frogman-woman/human woman semi-molestation sex, lots of peripheral frogman/human woman sex, and one detailed frogman/human woman vore instance. Also a post-cooking scene of human women as roasts, and the carving of their meat for consumption.
Type of Critique Preferred: Say whatever you feel you should. If you see a honking huge logic error in there, please say so; I seem to make an awful lot of those. If you see something and feel it's worthy of mention, then by all means mention it.
Questions for readers: Is it descriptive enough? Too descriptive? As in, too much peripheral exposition before the action? Should the female grenoils, the grenoelles, be given far more attention (stupid question: everyone or just about prefers female preds)? Is there anything I should add, or missed, whatever?

YOUR READING LIST:
Rating and Classification Preferred: I think I'm pretty much screwed this month. I don't want to read M/M, Scat, Furry, or underage works. Even F/? is getting tedious to me (granted, I've been in a stressed-out mood for months now). I'll probably end up reading whatever I'm assigned anyway, though I can't guarantee an in-depth review if it really doesn't appeal to me. My preference is M/F or ?/F in case that matters.

Critiquing Style: I'll be honest, and I may be harsh at times... I try not to be but I've found it depends on my mood. If the spelling is bad, that's a MAJOR pet peeve of mine and I'll say in no uncertain terms that you need to learn to spell. If I come across witty turns of phrase and I find the concepts and plot creative, I'll express my appreciation of such. I will often notice and pick out logic flaws if I see them. I try to temper my responses.

Don't forget to attach your writing!

Yep: http://aryion.com/g3/showitem.php?id=176304

...and if you want to read or re-read chapter one: http://aryion.com/g3/showitem.php?id=176185

Have a good month folks!

[4ofSwords]

Title/Summary: "Ambassadors of the Flesh Part Two: Meating the council."

Yay!